5th Avenue Life

Fifth Avenue Life

June 1927

Published by the

Students of the Fifth Avenue High School

Pittsburgh, Pa.

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Section IV.--Past, Present and Future

PAST AND PRESENT

(With Apologies to Hood)

Book 1

I remember, I remember

How in nineteen-twenty-three,

A freshman class had entered Fifth

To future seniors be.

They were the bashful "school kids,"

Afraid of teacher tall,

Who gazed up tot he seniors

Who proudly stalk'd the hall.

Book II

I remember, I remember

The braver sophomores,

The ones who would accompany

The varied games with roars;

The rooms where each would frequent

To study hard his task,

And cover failure with a grin--

Then leave it to his past.

Book III

I remember, I remember

Our happy junior days,

In which we shaped our future lives

In different kinds of ways.

The playful simple days flew by,

More serious thoughts had come;

The junior year brought harder work,

(And a dropping out for some.)

Book IV

I remember, I remember

That September day,

When we at last were Seniors,

Haughty, proud, and gay.

Then as our ship was ready

To leave the port so true,

Dear Fifth, farewell, we leave thee

A sad but wiser crew.

Pearl Singer

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History

CLASS OF JUNE '27'S PROGRESS FROM FIFTH AVENUE HIGH

Four years ago in September, 1923, there came into the halls of the Fifth Avenue High School a motley body of youths of different types who had been eager to gain more knowledge in the field of higher education. This body of learns had encountered various experiences, some with difficulty and others with ease. They had started out on this eventful path, the details of which we shall call "Class History."

Freshman Year

Everyone knows about the silly and foolish acts one does in the first year at high schoo, but we were a little different. Everything we accomplished was just "too cute for words" and we did not torment those around us.

Although it took us sometime to get acquainted with the smaller details of the school, we had with us a lad with slick, black hair who thought he was a Latin shark, because he knew a good deal of Italian (he was none other than Edward Leffler), but he soon gave up that ideas when he saw his first report.

We know that we caused the teachers many headaches and heartaches, but with Clara Harris, the teacher's pet, those pains were soon gone.

The second half of our first High School year was getting more interesting, ad we were getting more acquainted with the rest of the school, its faculty and its pupils. But a change was taking place in our class. Our boys were becoming more popular among the girls, especially Lawrence Cacolice, Thomas Martino, Hymen Slavkin, Louis Katz, Emery Stiener, Edward Benson, Thomas O'Connell, Harry Schrieb and Morris Ruben.

Sophomore Year

But, we left this low class and entered our Sophomore year. In our second year we were confronted with a social problem and with a mathematical one--geometry--that that three-fourths of the class tried to ignore. We were also very angry with the Board of Education because school was to be dismissed at three forty-five instead of three o'clock.

Another change occurred that was noticed immediately. That was that Morris Cohen was looked upon, even by the upper classmen, as the Beau Brummel of Fifth Avenue, and Eleanor Frank was becoming more recognized as a poet. This happened when a few of her poems were printed in the "News." This year went by as if on wings and before we knew it we were juniors.

Junior Year

Now we were half way through our course and oh my, what changes took place. Sarah Glass as senatrix was one of the best in the school Francis Fisher was one of the best debaters on political questions. Jeannette Fineman was working hard for our socials to be successful Edythe Abrams was becoming popular as a member of the Health Club. Hymen Bennett still let things pass with a smile. Carl Cataio was Coach Briggs' "best man." Frances Rice was becoming popular in the type class. Max Deakter began to like girls a little more. Abe Gordon began to make girls jealous of his wavy hair. Dora Young was crowned "Queen of Silence," Beatrice Miller let the school know that she could sing. John Barrymore found a rival in Ben Sufrin. Wynema Rickert was looked upon as a chief cook. Israel Maislish began to speak on philosophy. Joseph Ripp began to be a chemistry shark. Esther Singer decided to be an elementary school teacher. These are a few of the noticeable changes that took place. We all became debaters in English because it was a required subject. There were a few new faces in our class because many had gone to summer school, but, after studying their characters carefully we allowed them on our honorable roll call. Then came the final year, we were seniors.

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Senior Year

At last the long-looked-for time had arrived, and oh, how merry we seniors were. Were we merry in a very dull sense of the word? We were glad that we should soon be through our school term, but beneath all this our hearts were bitter because we had to leave our Alma Mater.

In this year a few of the pupils were initiated into the National Hone Society. A new kind of school paper was issued known as the "Newsette." A "News" staff was elected. Class officers were elected and many of the class were made members on different committees.

During the entire semester our new annex was used a good bit for Senior Assembly and for Junior Assemblies. It was in our Auditorium that Fifth with a few Seniors on its debating team won the Ohio Wesleyan Debating Trophy for championship. In the same hall Fifth Avenue won the oratorical contest from Business High School Ben Sufrin, an honorable senior, was the winner.

Besides all this many other great things happened during our reign. As Seniors, we were being threatened by Miss Simmens to fail in History if we did not work harder instead of worrying about commencement. So we had to work harder and forget about commencement.

Soon our final day arrived and on June 17, school days for us had ceased in Fifth Avenue and many of us had to start on Life's way.

--Alice Zerelstein

Class Poem

Four years so quickly have gone by

And June '27 is here,

A month in which the world is ours

The hope of many a year.

Although our happiness is great

Our joy is tinged with sorrow,

For thought we are with you today

Our paths shall part tomorrow.

Since work awaits each one of us

No matter what we do,

The thought of you will be our light

Our dear Fifth Avenue.

--Eva Bernfeld

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12 A-1 414

Barnett, Bernard                    Kasen, Jacob

Battaglia, Grace                    Klein, Harold

Benson, Edward                    Kodinsky, Mary

Borella, Charles                    Korpa, Andrew

Cager, Ruth                            McElroy, William

Colangelo, Aida                    Mohler, Harold

Colosimo, Lorenzo              Pearlstein, Abe

Frediani, Victor                    Reznik, Lawrence

Geinzer, Paul                        Rozboril, John

Goldgerg, Theodore            Sarasky, Eugene

Gross, Albert                         Schwarts, Adolph

Harris, Benjamin                   Selzer, Samuel

Hirschfield, Freda                 Shapira, Jymen

Holmes, Grace                      Silverman, Simon

Izzo, Michael                         Stone, Jacob

Kail, George                           Wishnev, Abe

Kaplan, Saul                            Yimin, Leo

Report Teacher: Miss Wolf

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12 A2 407

Abrams, Edith                       Katz, Louis

Bennett, Hyman                     Leffler, Edward

Bergen, Eugene                       Maizlish, Israel

Bernstein, Jacob                     Marcus, Belrose

Brockstein, Sam                     Maartino, Tom

Cacolice, Lawrence               Miller, Beatrice

Caldwell, Robert                    Parnes, Sam

Cataio, Carl                             Rice, Frances

Cohen, Mildred                     Ripp, Joseph

Cohen, Morris                        Ryave, Sam

Connors, George                   Schlesinger, Harry

Deakter, Max                         Schwartz, Adolph

Frank, Eleanor                       Silverman, Dorothy

Fisher, Francis                       Singer, Esther

Gordon, Abe                          Singer, Isadore

Greizman, Bertha                  Slavkin, Hymen

Harris, Clara                           Solomonen, Hymen

Kinkes, Harry                         Steiner, Emery

Horvitz, Ben                            Sufrin, Ben

Kalson, Harry                         Weisman, Nathan

Report Teacher: Mrs. Hamilton

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12 A-3 113

Aiello, Philip                        Levy, Leonard

Bluestone, Leon                   Lewis, Frank

Brookner, Esther                 Madison, Mary

Carey, Hazel                         Manning, Harriet

Cazen, Feda                           Nathan, Jacob

Cohen, Reubin                      Schultz, Irwin

Davidson, Frances               Shanker, Bennie

Davidson, Rose                    Shapiro, Sarah

Goldberg, Joseph                 Stinger, Louis

Highgate, Clara                     Stinger, Pearl

Hoffman, Bennie                  Tapper, Eva

Kart, Nathan                         Wolf, Saul

Kimball, Jerome                  Zerelstein, Alice

Levin, Myer                          Zweig, Blanche

Report Teacher: Miss Crawford

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12 A-4 210

Ballon, Fannie                    Levine, Rose

Bernfeld, Eva                      Nalepa, Arthur

Cohen, Fannie                    O'Connell, Thomas

Fineman, Jeannette           Pollock, Katherine

Fishman, Rose                    Rickert, Wynema

Gelman, Sam                      Ruben, Abe

Glass, Sara                           Ruben, Maurice

Greenberg, Maltida           Sadowsky, Maurice

Harris, Margaret                 Schrieb, Harry

Hiller, Ruth                          Silverman, Ben

Jacobson, Milton                Topel, Sadie

Jones, Myrtle                        Young, Dora

Kopp, Sylvia                         Zavosnick, Dorothy

Report Teacher: Miss Dougherty

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"Looking through the Magic Ball"

Jerome H. Kimball

Well, it was ready. The room was draped with dark red curtains and the lighting was dim. I was well disguised and seated behind a big crystal ball, amid many cushions. The room had a somber setting which helped to give a mystical atmosphere. I was a wizard, ready for business.

My first customer was Jack Bernstein. He came in shyly and secretively. He had eyes only for the crystal ball in front of me and missed the beautiful hangings with which I had been so careful to create "atmosphere." I had not yet decided upon a price for my forecasting, but when Jack handed me a "fiver," I didn't object.

"I don't know what to do," he said. "Tell me what I'll be twenty years from now. I want to know how to prepare for it and also how much schooling will be necessary."

Well, it was a year since Jack and I were schoolmates, and I didn't remember much about him. However, I sized him up in a few seconds. He was my first customer, and to make an impression on him would mean more customers later.

I looked into the crystal ball and in an undertone recited a beautiful little poem that put me in an imaginative mood. Aloud I said, "I see a man who is a big orator--a big orator who will develop into a great lawyer. He has many cases, many successes and many enemies. The worst of the latter is one, Hyman Bennett. For two dollars more, I can tell you how to get rid of said Bennett."

I wondered if Bernstein would bit. He did.

"This Hyman Bennett," I went on, "always is and always will be troubled by a sickness called Epolyonious. His physician, Joseph Ripp, sends to him regularly, by Francis Fisher, a concoction to relieve the pain of said sickness. A few dollars for Fisher and a few drops of hemlock for the aforementioned concoction, will turn Bennett's inclinations to other fields."

My customer was very well pleased and all signs of nervousness left his face as he went out.

I had no time to reflect, after he left, for another entered immediately. I recognized Edythe Abrams. Somehow her question was like that of Jack's. She was troubled by her vocation. She said she could bear it more easily if she knew what was to be the outcome of her many activities.

I waved my hands over the crystal and mumbled some magic words. "Behold, I see in the Ball one of the greatest social workers in the years to come. The greatest perpetrator of Woman Suffrage since the reign of Ma Ferguson. Her station will be attained by the help of such women as Fances Rice, Clara Harris, and Dorothy Silverman. What she will do in those days will make a name for her in the History of Histories."

I paused, and Miss Abrams asked if that was all. I decided that I ought not to overdo it, so I told her that the séance was finished. She left.

I was very well started and I was beginning to enjoy things. I awaited my next customers impatiently.

I planned just what to tell the next person so that I could speak more fluently. Sure enough, I did well, for in walked Hymen Shapiro and his close friend, Saul Kaplan. Hymen thrust out his hand and said, "Tell me my fortune."

I obtained an article from each and put it before the crystal ball.

I did not forget the $2.00.

I next gave them a beautiful description of a bright future for a couple of shyster lawyers. I told them of cases they would win, of controversies in which they would succeed and of opponents they would overcome. I told them of the renowned firm of

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Kaplan & Shapiro, and of a reputation that would stretch across the seven seas. I kept adding and adding until they could compare with Washington, Lincoln, and Mr. Jones combined. When I said I could tell them more for a few dollars, they dissented and left.

My imagination was in fine working condition, but my next three customers did not suit it. They were H. Hinkes, B. Horovitz and A. Ruben. For them I predicted a future, a future like unto that of Caesar, Pompey and Crassus. One was lazy, one slothful, and one averse to labor. They were to be great capitalists and Wall Street powers who fleece poor widows and young factory girls out of their pin money. They would wreck havoc among such innocent people as Hazel Carey, Frances Davidson, Rose Davidson and Blanche Zweig.

On hearing this, the three threatened to tear down the place unless I returned their money. But when I told them of a few facts of their school life, they quieted down and left. I saw that it was necessary to use tact.

My next customer was a woman. She was so heavily veiled I could not recognize her. At her entrance, a faint perfume spread about the room. She gave me her handkerchief and I saw in a corner the vaguely familiar initials F. C. I was in fine condition. I talked, I mumbled, I raved. There were mansions, there were limousines, ladies in waiting, as it were, like Clara Highgate, Ovella White and Mary Madison, and livered attendants like Harold Mohler and Frances Fisher. Millionaires like Nathan Kart, Rueben Cohen, Lewis Singer and Phillip Aiello came to visit her. I described a future, romantic, exciting and vivid. I used elaborate phrases and similes monstrous and subtle as orchids. There was glory and there was happiness. There was splendor, travel, experiences I created a Prima Donna, a Cleopatra, a Helen of Troy.

I stopped. Evidently I had gone too far for my fair customer was staring at me wide-eyed. Quietly she got up and went out.

I leaned back comfortably among my cushions and stared at my Crystal Ball. It looked like a single big eye there, and --suddenly--it winked at me!

From somewhere in that atmospheric place, I heard a voice say, "Jerry, Jerry, what an awful liar you have turned out to be!"

Our Happiest Day

When at time we sit and ponder
On the lessons life has taught,
When we pause to count the blessings,
That experience has taught,
There's a certain joyful moment
That we always shall recall
With delightful recollection,
As the happiest of them all.

On that day the sky is brighter,
Music has a finer tone;
Flowers breathe a sweeter fragrance;
Love itself has richer grown.
Gates that lead to realms of rapture,
On That day are opened wide;
When graduation means commencement
All the world seems glorified.
--Arthur Nalepa

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"Gone- - -But Not Forgotten"

In June, 1927, the Senior Class of Fifth Avenue High School died, succumbing to the deadly disease of "graduatitis." A few doctors of the faculty did all in their power to prevent this by liberal administrations of a medicine termed "failustupes," but their efforts proved in vain. The community has suffered an irreparable loss and it will be some years before the shock of the death of such an illustrious class is forgotten. Mourned by the faculty and students of Fifth Avenue High School. The account of its passing away follows:

EDITORIAL--BRILLIANT CLASS PASSES AWAY

It was with a sort of fatal premonition that we entered the famous Fifth Avenue High School, situated at the busy intersection of Fifth Avenue and Dinwiddie Street of Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania.

The magnet that has drawn us to visit this building was the June, 1927, Senior Class, whose spectacular exploits and great and noble deeds and actions had caused its fame to be spread far and wide over the fair face of the land, and caused the greatest educators to come flocking thither.

As we entered the building, we were struck by the solemn and almost reverent atmosphere that pervaded the halls. Students with sad faces were walking very quietly through the halls. Every now and then, they asked one another a question, and, receiving an answer, shook their heads sadly and walked on. We were mystified. It was indeed a great catastrophe that was able to create such a metamorphosis in the school. By the reports we had heard, Fifth Avenue High School was one where joy and happiness held sway.

We plucked up courage enough to ask a passing student what calamity had befallen the school to bring it to its present condition. With a catch in his voice and a tear in his eye, the boy told us that the illustrious class of June, 1927, was dying. Dying! The object of our trip across the continent dying? It was almost too much for us. But putting aside our disappointment, we determined to see the class before its death. Leaning that the class was breathing its last in Room 400, we hastened thither and arrived just in time to hear it dictate its will to its lawyer.

"--bequeath to our beloved principal, Dr. Rynearson, all love, compliments, and good wishes that previous classes have not willed him.

"Second, we bequeath to our vice-principal, Mr. Baird, a carefully planned oration with which to 'bawl out' unruly and rule-breaking students.

"Third, we bequeath to our guardian, Mr. Masters, and our chaperone, Miss Wolf, the pleasant memory of the great class which they were privileged to guide.

"Fourth, we leave to Mr. Powell, our custodian, an immaculate building.

"Fifth, we leave to the school:

1. The spacious and commodious dressing rooms in the gym, which were graced by our august presence. (Here the class caught its breath and groaned. It recovered in a little while).

2. Our inseparables: Ben Sufrin and has books (lost, strayed, or stolen); Abe Gordon and his white sweater; Hymen Shapira and his brains; that loving couple down in room 113: Borella McElroy, the Gold-Dust Twins; Joe Ripp and has 'didjapayerdues'; Saul Kaplan and has debating; Harry Hinkes and Frances Rice; our brains and good looks; our self-importance; and austere dignity. (Then the class had to rest a little while. It seemed to be getting weaker and weaker as the minutes flew by.)

"Sixth, we leave Mr. Demmler, our music teacher, our inspiration received from his beautiful concerts in the Auditorium.

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" Seventh, individually we leave the following:

Philip Aiello---Athletic equipment
Battaglia---Athletic school spirit
Ballon---Ability as a librarian
Bluestone---His good nature
Bennett---His good stature
Brookner---Mammy songs
Bernstein---His "line"
Barnett---His car
Connors---Pitching ability
Cacolice---Sophistication
Cataio---Athletic prowess
Carey--- Winning smile
Cazen---Acting (and how)
Deakter---The bakery, to future pie-eaters
Frediana---Big feet
Fineman---Her pep
Fishman---Giggle
Hirschfield---Everlasting chatter
Harris---414 Skwealer, a Ben-Har paper
Horvitz---Dopiness
Hinkes---Student government
Hiller---Hanger in 210
Hoffman---Journalist Club
Jones---Golden locks
Kart---The ladies
Kopp---Poetry
Kodinsky---Sunshine
Kimball---Philosophy
Katz---Great art work
Rose Levine---"Auburn" hair
Meyer Levine---Cheer leading
Miller---Beautiful voice
Marcus---Schoolgirl complexion
Nathan---Wild hair
Nalepa---Lunch-check salesmanship
Rozboril---Empty locker
Reznick---Salesmanship
Stone---F. A. Newsette
Selzer---Tardiness
Solomon---Headaches from nightwork
Sara Shapiro---Poise
Topel---Heftiness

(The class again had to rest here. It was seen that it had but a few moments to live.)

"We wish our remains be burned after our death and the ashes be scattered to the four winds so that the seeds of wisdom from the ashes will grow into huge trees of knowledge which will be permanent memorials of our greatness.

"We also wish that the news of our death be published in all the newspapers of the land, that the great loss be known and lamented.

"We appoint the said principal, Dr. Edward Rynearson, sole executor of this will."

The class took the pen and tremblingly signed its name. Then it fell back, gave a jerking shiver and then lay quiet still. It was dead.

Sorrowfully we wended our way outside, with a tear in our eye and a sob in our throat, that such an eminent group should fall the victim of a four years' dose of education.

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Who's Who---1947

AIELLO, PHILIP--Scientist. Almost discovered the elixer of live
BLUESTONE, LEON--Author. His latest book is "Halleck in Ten Easy Lessons."
CAREY, HAZEL--Advocator of women's rights. She is heading the committee to investigate "Why Men Prefer Blondes."
CAZEN, FREDA --Wonderful musician. Her last recital before Deaf Home was complimented by those not present.
COHEN, RUBEN __ Dean of Know-All College. His pupils numbering 300 have not returned since the first of the semester.
DAVIDSON, FRANCES-- Graduate of Congressmen's Blah School. Her record of 148 hours continual talking has never been broken.
DAVIDSON, ROSE-Originator of the fad to wear skirts again.
GOLDBERG, JOSEPH--Head of the Correspondence School that teaches "How Not to Waste Time and Money."
HIGHGATE, CLARA--Milliner. Her latest creation in hats emptied men's pockets
HOFFMAN, BEN--Traveller. He has just discovered that he forgot to visit certain parts of Cape Horn.
KART, NATHAN--Salesman of men's pocketbooks. He finds business very dull.
KIMBALL, JEROME--Astrologist. He has come to the conclusion that the big Bear's fur is white.
LEVIN, MEYER--Editor of Sports for the Tittsburgh Pellie.
LEWIS, FRANK--Big Butter and Egg Man. Since repealing the 18th amendment his business has been dull.
MADISON, MARY--Evangelist. She is in favor of women's smoking, chewing, bobbed hair, sh-aa (drinking).
MANNING, HARRIET--Domestic Science Teacher. Her latest dish of synthetic steak will be kept until a famine.
NATHINE, JACK--Heading expedition to discover the Lost Chord.
SCHULTZ, IRWIN--Rabbi. Schelly's "Necessity of Atheism" is a wonderful book, says he.
SHANKER, BEN--Merchant Tailor. "Your clothes, friend, must suit you," is his motto.
SHAPIRO, SARAH--Swimming instructor. New York to London was her latest achievement.
SINGER, LOUIS--Touring entire Iceland to give his interpretation of Beethoven on the violin.
SINGER, PEARL--The prize offered by the Batchelor Boys to girls won by her. Her record of keeping quiet was three minutes.
TAPPER, EVA--Secretary. She has just been promoted to publicity manager.
WOLF, SAUL-- President of the Banana Oil Co. Leads innocent boys and girls astray.
ZERELSTEIN, ALICE--Enemy of men. Her book on "How to Train Husbands" increased the divorce list.
ZWEIG, BLANCHE--Pianist. After playing on the Playwell, she received a reward from Playwell's rival company.
SHRIEB, HARRY--Eye Specialist. "The greatest trouble with men's eyes," he says, "is that they exercise them vertically too much."
SILVERMAN, BEN--Silversmith. His output of sterling dinner sets has increased due to the decrease in price of copper.
YOUNG, DORA--Short Story Writer of Women's Conversations.
ZAVOSNIK, DOROTHY--Combination umbrella and parachute for aeroplane promenaders is her husband's latest invention.
RUBIN, MORRIS--M. D. He is at present head of a campaign to build a poor home for those of his profession.
TOPEL, SADIE--French Correspondent for the Daily. A private interview revealed she is going to visit the places she wrote about.
--Ben Hoffman

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"Hall of Fame"

Hardest Workers---Frances Rice and Edythe Abrams
Hardest Shirkers---Lawrence Cacolice and Thomas Martino
Sanest---Fannie Ballon
Vainest---Theodore Goldberg
Funniest---Eleanor Frank
Sunniest---Charles Borella
Tardiest ---Sam Selzer
Smartiest---Leo Yimin
Laziest---Eugene Sarasky
Daisiest---Hazel Carey
Shyest----George Connors
Spryest---Dorothy Silverman
Biggest Si-mp---Si-mon Si-dney Si-verman
Biggest Primp---Matilda Greenberg
Gravest---Israel Maizlisch
Brightest---Saul Kaplan
Politest---Eugene Bergen
Most Stylish---Jeannette Fineman
Most Smilish---Sara Glass
Slickest---Francis Fisher
Quickest---Philip Aiello
Boldest---Robert Caldwell
Coldest---Maurice Ruben
Dearest---Hyman Bennett
Queerest---Jacob Xenophanes Nathan
Talkiest--- Freda Herschfield
Gawkiest---Frank Lewis
Moodiest---Jacob Kasen
Dudiest--- Harold Klein
Sprightliest---Frances Davidson
Slightliest---Katherine Pollack
Best Giggler---Rose Fishman
Best Wiggler---Hymen Solomon
Courtliest---Joseph Ripp
Portliest---Eva Tapper
Primest---Pearl Singer
Grimest---George Kail
Gladdest---Edward Leffler
Saddest---Eva Bernfeld
Most Scholastic---Hymen Shapiro
Most Fantastic---Freda Cazen
Busiest---Blanche Zweig
Frizziest---Bertha Greizman
Most Demuring---Mary Kodinsky
Most Alluring---Edward Benson
Most Ambitious---Ben Sufrin
Most Judicious---Abe Gordon
Mopiest--Jerome Kimball
Dopiest---Ben Horvitz
--Sarah Siegal.